I'm 34. Here's 34 things I wish I knew at 21

Summary

People communicate most honestly through jokes. Pay attention to them. If you can't refuse something, it owns you. Fear of being cringe will stop you living fully. Get over it. Don't take criticism from someone you wouldn't take advice from. Expect no applause for telling the truth. Sometimes doing the right thing costs you – friendships, comfort, peace. But always pay the price without question. Whatever scenario you're in, just act like you belong. The lazy person works twice as hard. Curiosity is a superpower. Honesty without kindness is brutality. Default to kindness. Though know when to be firm. Life never meets your youthful expectations. As an adult, you need to learn to find joy nonetheless. Death can come any day. Every day is a gift. Adults make a lot more sense when you realise they're just children in big bodies. Bears don't need motivation to hunt salmon for 12 hours straight. But put them in a circus and they need constant prodding to wave at an audience once. Motivation is a human problem – because we don't fit our 21st century environment. You must not be a circus bear. Humans struggle to mentally combine their "now" self and their "future" self. So treat your future self as someone you love and want to see thrive. Today's laziness is tomorrow's burden. Do them a favour. The obstacle is the way. Get used to it. Learn to love it. Books are a cheat code – many of life's problems were solved and written down long before you were born. But reading is half the equation. Without action in the real world you get limited results. Action backed by theory is a potent mix. The opinion of the person who rarely offers it is listened to more closely. A free-thinker's beliefs are unlikely to align neatly with any political party. If your beliefs align 75% with your political party, you're not free-thinking – you're just trying to fit in with your tribe. Super-forecasters – the people who predict events better than anyone else – change their minds constantly. They u...